New round, new donor, and the food that ist not be named

Never has the thought of a food made me so sick. A food I used to eat daily. Hcg is a strange thing.
It’s been 3 days since I got my hcg trigger shot and one day since iui.  The count and motility was way better than our previous donor. I had 3 follicles that were big enough and look like released (eek).  It’s so strange to see the changes during a cycle on the ultrasound.
I am very hopeful and excited!! I hope my aversion to the food that must not be named will be worth it! *fingers crossed*  test day is the 31st!


It’s been over a year

We’be been trying since January 2015 to have a baby. It makes me feel sad like I am incapable of carrying life. I know this is irrational, but sometimes it wins out.
We took February off to regroup, pick a new donor, and give me a break from the hormones.  Not to mention we needed all of our baby making money to move.  The doctor also put me on thyroid medications because my thyroid levels are not close to where they would like for fertility.
We are excited about our chances next month with a new donor. I’m taking everything possible, trying to relax, and stay positive.!


Round 3

So Round 2 was a bust.  I felt like I knew it before it as confirmed.  It was a whirlwind to start round 3 immediately after round 2.  Hurry up and get an ultrasound so you can get your clomid.  Then a weekend trip to LA to get one really expensive vial of sperm.  Two more trips to the clinic for ultrasounds.  Getting my LH surge 12 hours before I was supposed to take the shot. One HCG shot the next morning.  We did insem on 1/18 after she did another ultrasound to see how everything was. You could see the difference in the two follicles as it appear one released or was about to and the other was just starting.  I am hopeful about this round.

It amazes me the difference each HCG shot is.  The only symptoms to remain the same is my sense of smell and aversion to foods.  The last round I felt sick daily for about 8 days , then the shot wore off.  This time I am so exhausted, but not sick.  It’s just interesting.


Days 1-6 have been a really exhausted me thanks to a surge in HCG, hungry, smells other me, foods i usually love taste gross, I became a giant gas bubble and felt like it would never end (it has).

Tomorrow is day 7 so we will see what the next few days bring.  The waiting is so hard! If this round doesn’t work we have to take a break because we have to move and need that extra $1500 we spend a month on trying to have a baby on a deposit.


Round 2

Round 2 IUI was started on December 17 (my birthday). Clomid was used for 5 days and 10,000 mcg of hcg was used to trigger (at home! Eek!)
I am afraid to be too hopeful with statistics and all.  This time my symptoms have been similar and different. Part of me thinks PMS and the other hopes that twinge I felt was actually my uterus and not bowels.
Days 1-6 past IUI I felt really exhausted and tools naps which I don’t do. Scents bothered me, water tasted gross, I felt nauseated, and I ate yummy mango froyo with chocolate sauce. 
Day 7 past IUI is today. I felt energized and ready to do everything in a feisty kinda way. I have no patience. Water is ok. And scents! The world smells! Also some uterus twinges.

This two week wait is killer. Test day is December 31. Wish us luck! (If this one sticks the due date would be S’s birthday!)


That 20 %

That pink line made bright by hcg didn’t last.  It went up to 800 and then it went down.  Hcg was down to 93 on Monday and then it all started.  My new Ob/Gyn had prepared us for the most likely outcome of miscarriage the week before.  So disappointed, sad, lost, angry, confused. And in pain.  It’s been 3 days and I’m still having some pains that are a reminder that this one didn’t stick. The sadness comes in waves.  Just like the pain.

We plan to try again when the next cycle starts.  We are hopeful that the next one will stick.  And all I feel is scared that it won’t.  I know approximately 20 % of first pregnancies end in miscarriage.  But that just makes my odds better that it will be successful next time.


*Squints* Is that a pink line????

You know that moment when the line is so faint you start googling other peoples pictures of positive pregnancy tests?  That was me on the 8th.  Could it be?  I wasn’t sure so I ran to the dollar store and bought to tests (I didn’t want to be the cray ady who bought 10).  Sure enough another faint pink line.

On the 9th I took another test AND went to the dollar store to buy two more tests ( I made sure to go to a different cashier). I”m hanging on to my fancy first response test for the 10th when I’m hoping my hcg has increased. I took another test that same night and had the same results.

On the 10th I got out my fancy first response test and it took less than a minute for a dark pink “you’re pregnant!”.  What?  Oh my god what did we do? I spend this day researching and calling a new OB/GYN as my old one just became a GYN.  This new guy doesn’t want to see me until the 25th when they are guesstimating I will be 7-8 weeks along. I call my fertility clinic and ask if they would be willing to do a  blood test to confirm the pregnancy and they agreed!

On the 11th I ran to the lab to get my blood work done and waited all day for a phone call.  I called at pm and called, but they didn’t have my results yet. About 15 minutes later I get a call.  Congratulations! You’re pregnant! My beta was at 248 18 dpo.

This weekend has just been a whirlwind of S and I looking at each other and saying “oh my god there’s a baby in there!” Just in case we forget. We even went to Babys R Us today to start planning how to tell the family.  Tomorrow I will go back for another blood test to see if my beta hcg has risen at a respectable rate and to check progesterone.  I’m incredibly hopeful and can’t wait to start this next chapter in our lives!


hcg can be a b*tch

That trigger shot can be deceiving!  The first 7 days had to be symptoms from the hcg trigger shot.

Day 7 Some minor low uterine cramps that disappear by midday.  No more symptoms.

Day 8 No symptoms

Day 9 No symptoms. Feelings really good.  So much so that coworkers noticed my good mood.  Slightly homicidal (not seriously, just easily frustrated with everyone!)

Day 10 – No symptoms .  Feeling pretty positive, yet somewhat homicidal (just kidding).  My mood says I feel good, but don’t look at my sideways.

Day 11 – Went to be with what I thought was horrible AF cramps and I was waiting for it to start (which would be my usual…severe cramps and almost instant AF), but NOTHING.  No brown.  No red. NOTHING.  Had vivid dreams last night and S had to wake me up. Had sore nipples at night.

Day 12 – Low uterine cramps, nipples are still sore cried at “say yes to the dress”, and freaked out when I drop a bag of chicken that exploded on my kitchen floor.

Only have to get through day 13 and wake up on day 14.  Updates to come of course.